Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Life is full of tough decision making process -7

In business conversation, I have 3 basic principles to follow. 1st and most important is decide what I hope to accomplish beforehand, in other words, envision the best result prior to the discussion. 2nd is think and analyze what would be the worst result. 3rd is to determine the least acceptable result. All 3 points must be in my brain clear and visual before I start. Additional thing is that I try to take initiative of entire discussion.

But, it is not business talk" It is what I am talking with my own mother for my God sake! I stopped thinking, sat in front of my mother, and told her I will all listen.

My mother when she was her 60's with my father when he was alive.
It could be very much emotional if either I or my mother is not careful, my mother calmly started to talk. She said exactly as I thought she would. She is less confident in her health. She would like someone who can be close to her, living. She wanted me to be back to Japan living close to her.

It is natural desire for a mother to her only son. I told her that I understood. Further, I asked her if she can come live with us in California. (I needed my wife's agreement in offering this to my mother, and I had my wife's full agreement that time. Thank God!)

My mother thanked me for the offer, but she was not fully comfortable for living in a foreign country. This is quite understandable, as well. She is 85 years old after all.

Conversation going on and on including some memory talks about our father, my mother's sisters, my childhood, etc... It was time consuming process. But I was expecting it takes long time.

After 2-3 hours passed midnight, we decided to talk again later. Late next morning, my mother wanted short talk before my wife and I go out. She said "It was almost 10 years ago when I visited US last time. It may be about the time for me to visit and stay a while this time." I asked if she means to try live in California. She said "Yes".

Related Posts:
Life is full of tough decision making process -6
Life is full of tough decision making process -5
Life is full of tough decision making process -4
Life is full of tough decision making process -3
Life is full of tough decision making process -2
Life is full of tough decision making process -1

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Shaw Funami
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Marketing Unscrambled, learn to earn 14 said...

Hello Shaw,

Taking time to spend with your mother and the decisions that your need to make. They are difficult for you and for your mother. It is always good to spend time together with the ones that you love and honor.

Good luck on the decision that you are having to make.

Dan and Deanna "Marketing Unscrambled"

Shaw said...

Hi Dan and Deanna,

Thank you for your good advice. I agree that it always gives out better result if you spend time together.

Thank you for your comment.
Best regards,
Shaw Funami
Fill the Missing Link

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Shaw .. that must have been a very difficult time, but I guess your Japanese culture would help you there .. and it seems like your mother was realising that you and your wife had a future together in the States ..

I'm going to follow the next instalment now ..
all the best Hilary Melton-Butcher
Positive Letters Inspirational Stories

Shaw said...

Hello Hilary,

Thank you for your comment. I notice remarkable is that when I tried to push my mother strong, she tried to pushes back. It helped to talk with her casually and pleasantly, like talking about dinner menu.

Best wishes,
Shaw Funami
Fill the Missing Link