Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Emotional IQ - What is it? Why am I interested in it?

I am now self-employed running my family company  formed by myself.  Earlier in my carrier stage, I worked for a Japanese electronics company for 20 years.  Becoming an assistant manager in 1988, I started to study how to be a good manager.  It included emotional control for better performance and better management.

Later, I developed own scheme to control myself and teach our team member.  I used to say:

"Don't show it when you are angry.  Use your anger to get what you need to achieve in business.  Control your emotions so that they do not harm your business or life.  Use them to benefit yourself instead."

I was pretty much confident and comfortable that I could control my emotions to the extent that my emotion did not damage any of my business or relationship.

It was end of the year 2000 when I faced a decision if I should quit the company and do my own or stay.  I made a decision to quit and tried to start my own business.  It was my own decision and I believed that I am emotionally stable.

Then, in my effort of starting up my own company, which was supposed to be full of fun, I found myself out of control of my own emotions.  I was constantly resentful, remorseful, upset, confused, and depressed.  I could not control my own emotions in very sensitive and critical moment.  The worst is that all these negative emotions hit me same time and I did not know what to do.  I never went to a hospital, but I might have called it a panic attack.  I was lucky having my wife's help and gradually regained my emotional stability.  From this experience, I learned a precious lesson how difficult to control our emotions.

It was near end of last year when my wife and I were looking for information on Dog's IQ on Internet, we happened to find the word "Emotional IQ".  I was interested and did further research on the definition.

According to my research, Emotional IQ and Emotional Intelligence are almost  same meaning and definition.  Emotional IQ is the ability, capacity, skill or, a self-perceived ability, to identify, assess, and manage the emotions of one's self, of others, and of groups.

I have been aware there are several therapy which is not known in outside of US, such as emotional control or anger management.  But, I was not aware that there is a study trying to measure one's ability of controlling emotions until last year.

If you acquire an ability to perceive and control your emotion and others, you can have better control over your life, business.  Most importantly, if you are confident and comfortable controlling your own emotion under no matter what kind of panicky situation, you can be more relaxed all the time.  You can be very much peaceful in your mind in your life.  That's why I believe learning and knowing on Emotional IQ is very important for all of us.

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Shaw Funami
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